Is ‘true love’ something we can strive towards?

young couple holding hands

cartoon cats sitting on a rooftop

You’ve likely encountered it. You may have been snuggling on the couch, watching a movie, but slowly losing interest in proceedings to the point where a conversation with your partner seemed a more beneficial activity. You may have been readying yourself for a dinner party in the bathroom together fighting for sink space but deep in thought, or in the car drive home from the supermarket on a dark, cool evening. There are many situations you may have been in with your partner but at some stage, it is likely the thought has popped into one of your heads, “does true love exist”?

It is a question many have raised but one that is very difficult to answer. For starters, how do you define what true love is? The simple answer is you can’t. True love is a concept that likely possesses different characteristics depending on the individual’s opinion. The major problem with defining true love is that many possible defining characteristics can be debated, for example:

TIME

Does true love require time to achieve? Do you need to be in a relationship for years, or is it something that a couple can instantly feel?

MUTUAL or INDEPENDENT

For true love to exist does the couple both have to share the same feelings. Surely, they do. Or do they?  Why can one not experience true love with another where the feeling may not necessarily be mutual. If true love resides within then this must potentially be a possibility.

We vs I

If true love exists does that mean that you are a joint entity, or are you separate individuals that purely mold well together to create the ideal couple?

SEXUAL vs NON-SEXUAL

Is sex a vital ingredient in a relationship that features true love? The topic is always discussed around couples in a committed relationship but why is this a prerequisite? Can the most wonderful of friends not experience true love? Some of the greatest relationships I know are 100% plutonic, and the two individuals comprising these relationships love each other to the end of the Earth and would do anything for each other. Do these people not qualify as exhibiting true love?

 young couple holding hands

It is debatable categories like this that make us question whether true love is obtainable. Does it need to be defined first for us to identify whether it truly exists? Or is this purely a matter of the heart and one that if we are fortunate enough to find it, will know that we are experiencing true love in its purest form? Maybe that is just it. Maybe the reason we debate it is that we haven’t found true love and when we do the answer will become clear.

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